Love, Elder Jerman

AMBER ALERT: My sister Alicia turned 22 years old on June 14. That is all. No kidding HAPPY BIRTHDAY ALICIA! Gracias por hacerme reír siempre y por ser un ejemplo para mí. Te quiero mucho! CAPÍSIMA!!!

Monday

I may or may not have bought a Magic deck with the emergency cash I have. Don't tell anyone.

Tuesday

Clean day. The bathroom was this week's target. Some of our best work. Then we played Magic for like 40 minutes. And then for another 5 hours. That evening we had a lesson with our boy Carlos. After, because now they allow us to call our families for special occasions, I called to tune into my sister's wedding reception. Honestly from my point of view it was pure chaos and I couldn't see anything and half the time it sounded like I was in a black hole but I'm sure the whole thing was lovely. Apparently there is a cardboard cutout of me with a tiny head that made an appearance at the wedding. My worst fear.

Wednesday

That night, we went over to the Tucker place (other Elders in our apartment complex). We tried playing some Magic with 4 people but it wasn't organized very well and it ended up being a 2 hour game and nothing happened the whole time and honestly it was a big waste of time and I'm never playing Magic again that's how pointless it was.

Thursday

So we played some Magic, and then we had district council and exchanges after. I was with our DL, Elder Downs from California, cool guy. We made a quick stop by the mission office and talked with the office Hermanas for a bit. Nothing but business of course. That night we met at the church building to switch back, and then did an English live class.

Friday

So you may remember last week I made some pretty impressive quesadillas. This day I managed to top those. 2 quesadillas, 1 chicken, one ground beef. But here's the catch. The ground beef was friend in peanut butter. Added onions and lime again of course. Tossed some tomatoes and lettuce on there and it turned into a massive taco. Put me out of commission for 20 hours.

Saturday

We had another sports activity with some of the ward again. This time we did it in the evening to prevent hear exhaustion, death or even worse, dehydration. Drink water everybody. We ate pizza and then played soccer. My companion absolutely launched the soccer ball right into my nono square but I had to play it off, can't be grabbing yourself in front of a bunch of young women and sister missionaries. Tears streamed down my face as I limped onward. Boos sounded from the raving fans. Homosexual slurs thrown at me left and right. I powered on. After we played volleyball inside which was a blast.

Sunday

I got to call Alicia for her birthday, then of course as the schedule goes for Sundays, I made the boys the Pastaroni feast, complete with toast and a smoothie. It's down to a science. Stay tuned for next week for a possible addition of V E G G I E.

Bullet Beans

• Week 2 of Accutane, I had to pick up a piece of my chin off of the floor and throw it away. I am wilting. Onward.

• I saw some fireflies this week, reminding me of my summers in Iowa. I have now elected to continue living. My other options all included to keep living as well because I'm jus vibin you know how it goes

• I spent a solid 3 or 4 seconds pulling on a handle of a car I thought was ours, realizing it wasn't I turned and found my companion staring at me smiling. Refusing to be helpful and enjoying my demise. Then it happened again. 1 week later. The same place. The same car. The same result.

Love, Elder Jerman

1B2F, formerly 2B1F

2B1F because I'll never change

I am realizing only one person understands those jokes my bad

Teller of unfunny jokes that not everybody gets

TEAM UNCLE SNOOPY

Pics

- Just taught these guys the law of chastity. They've still got a ways to go considering they live under the same lightbulb.